Montag, 29. Januar 2007

The End.

This is the end. Today, forever, for eternity. In case you don't believe what I am saying, have a look outside. There is a dead dog in front of your house. It was killed by aliens. These Aliens have Laserguns, and they'll kill each and everyone on this planet, starting with the dogs (they don't like dogs very much).

So don't save your dog, save yourself! The only thing you can do is the following: Send me 10 Dollars (or whatever other currency), and I will talk to them. Since they've known me for years, they might just kill all the dogs and then leave us alone.

Mittwoch, 17. Januar 2007

Jamie Oliver sucks.

I thought I had different problems, but this one is definitely a serious one. World, listen to me: Jamie Oliver sucks. Big time. And all those other TV-cooks as well. Many people don't know this, but quite some time ago, Jamie Oliver said the following thing: Yes, I confess, I am a rassist and I stole my mum's purse while she was having a bubblebath with our neighbour's dog. Naked! And I also admit that all the software and music I own is stolen, and when I was young I extorted little children so they had to give me their lunchbox. Unbelievable, isn't it? Thank god we all got internet acces now and we can all let each other know what is REALLY going on in the world.

Anyway, who would trust a dude who's cooking meals on TV? I wouldn't, never ever, no way. So, the choice is yours: fall in love with a smiling face on your television, believe in a fake attitude of a capitalistic cook and dig a big grave for everyone who has to eat (which is, by the way, the whole world, including developing countries) or start a riot against cooking shows. We will see us in the streets, it's the Djihad of us, the eaters! Burn Jamie burn, kitchen inferno! Burn Jamie burn, kitchen inferno!!!

Sonntag, 14. Januar 2007

Nickout under pressure.

I used to be a really normal an lazy person. And I still am, which sucks from time to time. But a few years ago, I became ambitious, and that's a dangerous combination, as I am about to find out these days.

In 2001 I started surfing. It made me mad. There was never anything in my life quite like it. It was so hard, but I wanted to be able to do it so much, more than anything ever before. And I did. It still is the best thing to do in the world, it is better than sex, food, drugs... you name it. This wave on the picture is in Pavones, Costa Rica, one of the best days in my life.

Then... While being at work, I found out that my ambitious mindset also had taken over other areas of my life, not only surfing. It went well, I did a good job, it felt great. Today the same thing is a huge problem for me. I switched jobs, I'm going to school at night and somehow troubles are coming at me out of all directions. My ambitioins demand great results from everything I do, but it doesn't happen anymore just like that. Even my Hattrick-team is fucking up on a regular and very unlogic basis.

What the hell is wrong?

I want my old world back, I want everything to work out well for me. It's so hard to tell yourself to fight for it when you're doing it for the first time. Unfortunately it is not nearly as much fun as surfing.

May be I should start praying.

Donnerstag, 4. Januar 2007

Just to make sure.



Just to make sure that the world is really about to collapse, I'm writing my second entry today! Even in a funny color which must be extremely depressing to some of you who do not read this. Ha, ha!


Mittwoch, 3. Januar 2007

Hello Internet, I hate you.

I can't believe I'm writing a blog.

This is horrible.

This is the most definitive end of all my believs.

Instead of talking to my girlfriend, my mother, my brother, my friends or even a fucking psychiatrist, I'm talking to people I don't know. Now that I changed my mind about blogs, mankind must be moving towards living like in The Matrix.

At least that would give us all the opportunity of going through an adventure (like in the movie). Cause life ist boring. Escaping towards stuff like secondlife.com is only one way to break out.

What am I talking about? Will I have a RJ45-cable in my ass in a few years? I should give up this blog right now and go out and hug a cow. Cows are cool because they don't know shit about the WWW.

I shouldn't think about stuff like that. This blog is making me crazy. And I should write in German anyway.

I wanted to think less in 2007, may be I should start now.